There was a time when I was aggressive and demanding. I am far from perfect, and at times still probably a little demanding, but I am a work in progress. I am not perfect, and expect I never will be. I have come a long way, but know that it is a never ending journey.
I have spent much of my life like many people ... a little misguided. My idea of success was to dominate and win. Anyone can live this way, but there is a price that comes with the lifestyle. Stress and unhappiness were side effects of the world I lived in then. I remember the pressure of the destructive nature of my life back then. It was taking it's toll on my health ... I knew it was no way to live, and that changes needed to be made.
There was a point when I enjoyed arguments, and could win most ... but it produced a lot of negative energy. I could feel the toxic juices flowing throughout my body during the heat of battles ... it was ugly, and in the end, wrong.
I decided that my lifestyle, the way I thought, my goals and intentions had to re - tuned to be healthier and more loving. I set out on a mission to improve my world, my future, my spirit and my health. It would be an upward spiral that involved daily efforts to tap into the positive forces within us all, and focus on what is good in our world.
Adversity can often be a wonderful catalyst for change, and for me it was a battle with Crohn's Disease and a failed marriage. I remember not liking who I was back then and knowing my life needed to change.
Setbacks happen. They are part of life, and we all stumble from time to time. If we can learn from them, forgive and move on, we can be richer for it.
I continue to try to grow and improve. I focus on love, joy and positivity. Life has improved and my world is filled with many good things I am grateful for. The journey continues, day by day, and I keep heading for that man I want to be.
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